Friday, May 23, 2014

I don't know

Something is wrong

That feeling in you that something is off and you need to fix it.

But you don't know where to start.

I am feeling an emptiness. I don't know if this is the start of a depression episode or the start of major change. I really hope the second one. I realized this morning how selfish I really am. I always knew I was selfish like everyone knows they are. But I realized how far into that pit I have gone. I need to start doing for others and stop taking from others without concern. What I really need to do is build my faith, pour my soul into Him and His word. Learn how I can start serving. To give back everything that has been given to me. I don't even really know where to start. I am stationary so driving out to help others is not a current option. I just am lost right now. I have been lost in sadness, hopelessness, envy, anger, apathy. Where do I go from here?

I know this post makes no sense whatsoever. My mind is a jumble and I am trying to sort it out. Just bear with me because I think things are about to get a little topsy turvy.

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